


With Liberty and Free Pizza For All

by Good_News_Everyone



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Hawkeye For President, Vote Barton/Romanoff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-18 03:55:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5897317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Good_News_Everyone/pseuds/Good_News_Everyone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘Clint, I’m not saying you <em>can’t</em> do it,’ Bruce said patiently. 'I’m just saying, as the opening line to an inauguration speech, <em>Honestly, I never thought I’d make it this far</em> lacks a certain amount of panache.’</p>
            </blockquote>





	With Liberty and Free Pizza For All

**Author's Note:**

  * For [copperbadge](https://archiveofourown.org/users/copperbadge/gifts).



> Inspired by this Tumblr conversation:
> 
> coolsuitnerd asked:  
> After seeing the questions about Steve running for president - I have to ask; how far would Tony and Clint get in having Clint run as a frivolous candidate ("Elect me and everybody gets free arrows!) before someone stopped them?
> 
> copperbadge answered:  
> IDK, I’m pretty sure if you run independent and you jump through all the ballot access hoops, you can get on the presidential ballot. With Tony’s money behind him, getting on the ballot would be relatively easy, I think. Clint could go all the way! :D

‘Clint, I’m not saying you  _can’t_ do it,’ Bruce said patiently, watching the archer pace the length of the tiny green room, ‘because we all know that telling you that you can’t do things is what got us here in the first place. I’m just saying, as the opening line to an inauguration speech, _Honestly, I never thought I’d make it this far_  lacks a certain amount of panache.’

‘Well, it’s that or _Oh God, what have I done_ , take your pick,’ Clint said, a slightly manic look in his eyes. ‘Or maybe, _Oh God, what have **you** done_. This is all Tony’s fault.’

‘Technically, this is actually all on Steve,’ Tony called from the corner where he was gleefully tweeting rude replies to the less graceful-in-defeat of their opponent’s supporters. ‘He’s the one who decided to run a frivolous candidate to show, and I quote, ’the inherent farcicality of our current political system’. _You_  got on board because he bribed you with a six-pack of your favourite beer and a purple rhinestone collar for Lucky. I just bankrolled it because I thought it’d be funny, and also he made the puppy dog eyes at me.’

‘I ran on a platform of ‘free pizza for everyone and bows and arrows for all members of the voting public’!’ Clint squawked, waving his arms wildly. 

‘Never underestimate the American national affection for pizza,’ Tony said sagely. ‘Also for personal weaponry.’

‘You know the only reason I haven’t faked my death and run off yet is because that would leave Natasha in charge, right?’

‘Are you saying you don’t think she’d be up to the task of running a country?’ Bruce said, raising one eyebrow.

‘What, no, she’d do an excellent job,’ Clint said, staring at him. ‘She’d turn it into a terrifying Latveria-esque god-dictatorship within, like, a month, two, tops. That’s what I’m worried about. Also she’d ban corndogs nationwide to spite me for sticking her with the job, and a life without corndogs isn’t one worth living.’

‘I think you may be slightly overestimating the scope of your presidential powers,’ Bruce said.

‘Watch it, big guy, I think making fun of me is technically treason now.‘ Clint took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. ‘All right. Let’s do this thing.’


End file.
